And that’s okay.
You know…everyone has a certain tolerance for change. Some people have a high tolerance for change while others have a low tolerance for change.
Regardless of that tolerance one thing is true – everyone is not 100% okay with all of the changes that happen in their life.
And most people are not comfortable with changing friendships.
I am one of those people.
I consider myself more inclined to develop interpersonal relationships via one-on-one interactions. I can be just about anyone’s friend, and be a part of the “crowd hype” at gatherings, but I cling to those friendships that are intentional because it requires sacrifice, commitment, and trust.
I will admit that it is hard for me to adjust to people who change, and to people who especially change their mind about the relationship we have.
But, over the last year, and being married to the most handsome and amazing man I have ever met, I have noticed that my current relationships have changed. They’ve changed quite a lot.
I’ve noticed that some friends have started pulling themselves away. I’ve noticed that some friends personalities have changed. I’ve noticed that I’ve developed new friendships and have grown deeper relationships with those who choose to stay.
People grow. People change. People don’t remain the same.
I’ve come to terms with it. As we all gain life experience, and overcome new challenges we are faced with, we will all eventually bring new perspectives, values, opinions, and beliefs to the table.
Because of that, not everyone in our current circle will be okay with the changes. Those who grow with you will stay while others who no longer wish to take part will fade away.
It’s a part of the process of growing up, and you never stop growing up.
I want you to know, just like I have come to know, that it is okay for your friendships to change. This means accepting your current friends for who they have grown into, or saying good bye to those who want to leave (even if they leave silently – you’ll notice – I promise).
The people who work just as hard as you in keeping your friendship alive are those you fight for. Don’t be worn down or weary by those who choose to walk away. It’s okay. They may not be meant for you in this season.
And, if you have friends who have changed because of things they have experienced then sit down and listen. Try to understand where they are coming from, and gain a new perspective on life. That’s how we all grow.
And, if you have developed some new friendships in this season then take the time to grow some roots. It’s okay to invest in new people (albeit a little scary), but they could be who you need right now.
Although change can be uncomfortable it can mostly be beneficial into growing us in to the women we are meant to become.
We are all doing life together. It’s truly a forest.
It’s full of twists and turns, dry seasons and wet seasons, good growth and bad growth, and most of all, people who help root us despite the ever changing climate.
There will be shallow planted people, and deep-rooted people you will encounter in life.
Take it in stride, grow from every encounter, and allow things to fall into place.
The last thing you want to do is to stay stuck in the “I wish things never changed.” Doing so will rob you the opportunity to truly connect with the people around you, and who are with you, right now.